If you ever find yourself getting up at 5:45am on a Saturday in the dead of winter, you’d better have a damn good reason. Whether or not journeying to Amish country with four friends in search of Pennsylvania’s largest all-you-can-eat smorgasbord is a good reason, well, that remains to be seen, but on February 27th, 2010 it was reason enough for me.
To those of you who aren’t familiar,Shady Mapleis something of a mystery wrapped inside a riddle wrapped inside an enigma. Located in the beautifully named Blue Ball, Pennsylvania, it stands alone in the middle of farm country as a seething, roaring tourist facility bent on catering to the wants of every red-blooded, patriotic, sweat-pants-wearing American consumer this side Pittsburgh.
Even for a man with my unbridled enthusiasm, it’s incredibly difficult to portray via blogging just how much of a mindfudge this place really is. Regardless, I’ll attempt to do it here in 34 pictures or less.
Contrary to popular belief, father-in-laws are not always curmudgeonly, judgmental jerks who secretly wish you never married their child. In the case of my falcon whispering father-in-law Brad Felger at least, it couldn’t be further from the truth. Brad is a really stand-up kinda guy, and when the two of us get to talking I get the impression he’s very pleased I’m around. In certain circles, one might assume the two of us are actually friends.
Being so buddy buddy and all, Brad invited me to join him on a routine falcon hunting exercise over the holiday break. Naturally, I accepted the invitation.
“We make the slices by hand, and then, we thrash the streets to get ‘em to ya” - that’s the promise of skate pizza founder Andrew “Graffiti” Scafidi. He may not own a cell phone, or check his emails as often as the pizza-loving community of Philadelphia would like, but I’ll be darned if this skate pizza video isn’t a stroke of pure awesome.
Now, if only somebody in this city would open up a “skate pierogi” shop…
Saw this on highway 1 whilst traveling through California this past summer. I don’t know how they celebrate Christmas over in Monterey, but it sure looks like fun.
Anyone who knows the real Brian Dwyer knows that I’m somewhat of clean freak. Border-lining on O.C.D like behavior, I tidy up things around the house like it’s my job (in fact, it actuallywasmy job for a brief period, when I was a professional cleaning guy back in the spring of 2008). I mean, one of my favorite pastimes as a kid was strolling down the cleaning aisle and taking huge whiffs of laundry detergent bottles at the grocery store (true story).
That being said, one of my dreams as an adult is to someday own a Dyson vacuum cleaner - irrefutably the best manufacturer of vacuums on the planet (the Roles Royce of the medium, if you will, with a price tag to match). Being such a huge fan, you can imagine my unabashed delight when Danielle and I spotted the new Dyson Airblade hand dryer at an LAX bathroom a few weeks ago.
While strolling around Fishtown, we spotted this protest sign at the corner of Columbus and Frankford.
Brothers and sisters, it’s high time we as a people rally together and put an end to MC Hammer’s tyrannical reign of oppression upon the good people of these United States!
Three weeks into the new decade, and I couldn’t be happier; so far it’s been a remarkable time for horribly awesome child-themed internet videos. Between Sword Fightin’ Phil, Mini-Daddy and now thiskid, Danielle and I have almost been rendered speechless (we’ve got a blog to run here, people). One thing is certain though - if the rest of the year is full of treasures this wild, 2010 is sure to be a banner year in the history books.
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, we’d like to call Bob Offenberg to the stand:
To find out more about Bob, you can visit his website. Whether or not you can read Dutch, be sure and check out the “Fanshop” section. You don’t need a translator to appreciate all the amazing Bob Offenberg memorabilia…or to watch this half amusement park commercial/half national pride pop masterpiece.
I’m Brain, and this is my wife Danielle. We live in Philadelphia. We like awe-inspiring things. You must like them too, because you’re on our blog. Awesome!